Your Mom’s a Civic Duty

I’ve never been convinced, even a little bit, that a jury of my peers would be any better than a panel of judges under close public scrutiny. As a matter of fact, I think most of my peers are total fuckwads who have every incentive to do a half-assed job of reaching a verdict.

I’m sure that somewhere, deep in the bowels of the Los Angeles County administrative buildings, there’s a giant computer – so old that it’s still mostly vacuum tubes. And that computer is sending gleeful little currents through its front transistor-paws and laughing, because it knows how to pick the exact wrong time to call me in for jury duty.

May God damn it.

Also, one of my spams today called me Marlys. I don’t know why, but that made me feel just a little bit warm and fuzzy inside, as if I had just taken a shot of hard liquor.


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