Almost Obligatory Meta-Introspection on the Occasion of my Blog’s Birthday
Yes, I’m in it for the ego trip. I’ll say that right up front, because I’m going to mention a few other things I’ve got out of this deal and I don’t want to sound like a zealot. I am tickled out of my gourd when someone enjoys this stuff, or decides that I am an interesting person because of it – particularly if that someone happens to be erudite and entertaining, and has never dealt with my spit-up (sorry, Mom and Dad). And that’s why I keep doing it – I still need external validation.
Does one ever stop needing external validation?
So I’ve been feeling more honest, more straightforward, less willing to put forth the effort to rationalize, to build pretenses, to hide. I can’t tell if this has shown up to the people around me, but it’s made a shift in my inner dialogue, and I really want to blame the blogging. After all, being blunt and unapologetic takes practice.
I’m not sure if that last paragraph actually meant anything or not. I got distracted, reading my own archives and marvelling at how clever I am. I forgot all of the other things I was going to say.
It’s probably just as well.