The Difference Between Shit and the Internet
This was on metafilter, so you’ve probably all seen it already: The Internet Is Shit. You may not have seen plasticbag.org defending Fair Internet’s honor. It seems that other people have also spent a great deal of effort crafting arguments on the relative beings of shit and the Internet, but such efforts are unwarranted. The Internet is clearly not shit, as this simple comparison table shows.
| Shit | The Internet |
|---|---|
| Produced by an animal’s digestive tract | Originally produced by DARPA |
| Harbors nasty bacteria | Harbors nasty viruses |
| Used to communicate hatred, disgust and displeasure | Used to communicate boredom, listlessness and ennui |
| Matte brown in most cases | The Internet has no clearly defined color, but is probably shiny |
| Can usually be disposed of with just one or two flushes | Won’t fit in your toilet |
| Can contaminate water supplies and cause outbreaks of cholera | Can provide information about cholera |
There are more differences, of course, but if you’re ever confused about whether something is shit or the Internet, this should be enough to help.
Incidentally, when I first saw the domain internetisshit.org, I thought Hey! That’d be a great name for a blog! In some ways, blogs are the new garage bands of the 21st Century.
yami wrote:
Original comment from Chris · August 1, 2020 02:34 AM
Posted 18 Aug 2020 at 8:43 pm ¶
tony stipetic wrote:
the internet is shit, it’s true.
Posted 15 Jun 2020 at 4:51 pm ¶
tony stipetic wrote:
I can’t believe it’s been nearly two years since someone else has realised this.
Posted 15 Jun 2020 at 4:55 pm ¶
Anonymous wrote:
sad shites
Posted 11 Sep 2020 at 9:42 am ¶
tony stipetic wrote:
Well actually the internet comprises of 99.99999999999% shit.
And twats like you Mr Anonymous, who don’t even have the guts to put your own name to an insignificant insult directed towards two dudes who at least have an opinion, and given could half a chance could make this world a better place.
Why don’t you try directing your scathing wit towards more worthy and deserving individuals such as George Bush, Robert Mugabe, Tony Blair, Paul Daniels etc.
Posted 14 Oct 2020 at 4:34 pm ¶
I wrote:
The fact is we are not sufficiently evolved to appreciate what computer technology can do. It only offers relief to one maybe two of our multitude of senses. Last time i noticed i still need to eat organic sustances and excrete them. I still have to move around vigourously until i perspire each day to support a pumping cardiovascular muscle that my body requires to live. I still have to walk under the rays of our sun and breath the fresh air to help keep my bodies complex hormone system in some state of normality. I could go on but the crunch here is the fact that we, unfortunately, are not ruled and manipulated by 0’s and 1’s. With all these myriads of eventualities that are supposedly at our finger tips has it made it a better world to live in, thats debatable, and has it made the individual a more contented and mindful human being, i doubt it. But maybe it has opened some eyes that were shut but only then does it destroy what it makes in the form of escapism on a global scale. When the foundations of a society(The West)are built on sand you can only build so high. A philosopher said that ‘if the hand does not move the stick, the stick will not move anything else’ quite an obvious assumption to make but never has it been more prominent than now. I bet the american and many other governments and sick leaders love the fact that 75% of their population has got their head stuck in a computer all day ‘how to subdue the animals’ and any dissedent feeling that may arise during their lives is played out by ranting onto a computer screen. The Internet has its positives attributes but too much emphasis is played on it im not saying it was rosey before, far from it, but it is not the answer and in our apathy that is caused by it we will pay.
Posted 18 Nov 2020 at 6:03 pm ¶
forrest wrote:
I shit the internet.
Posted 27 Mar 2020 at 7:10 am ¶
my name? shit. wrote:
thank you, forrest. I’m glad you managed to pass that. I always love it when someone elucidates what they are thinking in such an articulate manner.
Posted 29 Jul 2020 at 3:46 pm ¶
papaspank wrote:
the whole internet is shit thing…
The internet is like a phone, a canvas or any other non-direct communication system. They’re only as good or crap as the content.
(as T.I.I.S. site said - the media is not the message)
its more of a reflection of ourselves, warts and all.
If it was utterly shit - it simply wouldn’t exist (trouble is 90% of day time TV is shit, and yet that’s just fine-go figure).
as a medium - it isn’t shit at all, we’re all able to send masses of emotional works, data, art, nonsense and things to everyone in the world at a click of a mouse. This of course, is a wonderful life enhancing thing…
And there’s the problem…
You see, faced with such a huge audience… we tend to bypass any forms of self editing we usually muster when say talking to our credit card companies or banks , or the office girl we quite like - but are a little wary of because we got hurt in our last relationship..etc…
And we go all out with opinions that really only very few people would actually give a monkey about…
Let me put it another way, if you gave everyone an A4 peice of paper - and asked them to write one side about things they liked and why… you’d be amazed at how many things you just couldn’t relate to at all.
‘I like sitting on park benches smelling were old people have sat down…’, or the ever sweet ‘I just love puppies - they’ my fave animal ever’
in short..some might shock, some might amuse, some might even get you to think a little about something you’d never really considered worthy of brain cells.
Overall though - after a certain time sifting thought these millions upon millions of pages, you’d find alot of things that you had no interest in whatsoever.
And that I’m sorry to say is the internet at the current time.
there’s some truly good stuff out there (some of the points on the internet is shit are VERY valid - some are just opinions and best left at that)…
However, it seems to be getting more and more of a chore to actually FIND good stuff without having to wade through a maze of mindless tedium, ’shocking’ images, naff ropey porn, and outbreaks of ‘THE Big I AM’ that if ocuring in the wrong pub on a saturday night - would end in some serious bloodshed…
In conclusion then, the internet is as only as shit as we have made it to be.
to cut to the bone - if you cleaned out all the servers/hosts of dead links, tired old pages, style-over-content-eye candy, self obssessed blogs,dodgy web cams, images of filth, ‘get your religion here it’s the best one’ sites, ‘famous people aren’t they great?’ sites, ‘look at me i’m on the web - can you love me now?’ sites… maybe just maybe, we’d find some interest in the thing called the web again.
Maybe then we could say a bit more that ‘well it’s not complete shit’.
I hope so.
Posted 06 Sep 2020 at 3:28 pm ¶
Jake wrote:
This is an invention, we all are able to contribute to.
If the internet is shit, it’s the fault of you, me, and the people just like us out there.
Posted 14 Sep 2020 at 2:10 pm ¶
papaspank wrote:
Yes, Jake.
So true, a bit like my previous but with less words.
consise to the point.
Good.
Posted 30 Sep 2020 at 7:07 am ¶
Tom Rendell wrote:
the fact that youve taken the time to literally highlight the differences between ’shit’ and the internet highlights the basically pointless and childish things the world wide web is now so often used for, by witty computer geeks such as yourself.
Posted 18 Aug 2020 at 9:34 am ¶
RT wrote:
Only when we look back in a post-apocalyptic rear-view mirror will we realize just how damaging the internet was; and how it was used against us by so many as a tool in bringing down our civilization…
Posted 20 Aug 2020 at 6:19 pm ¶
IshitINTERNET wrote:
Every time I go to a toilet I make a little bit of Internet.
When some ask me where I’m going, I clearly say to them: “I communicate with my fellow humans.”
omg, it feels like it’s Internet time again…
come-come, let us communicate.
Posted 17 Sep 2020 at 4:16 am ¶
simon wrote:
i totaly agree
Posted 05 Nov 2020 at 7:02 am ¶
Indecisive Harmony wrote:
If the question is whether or not the internet makes the world a better place, people have been debating this for centuries. I think the sad part is that we have already taken it for granted. I don’t think we’ve seen the full scope of the potential of the internet. Wait till you can go down to the Sev and by a Wireles interte PDA $20 . The internet we say now will some day be called the old internet.
Main point being that we all need to progrss a little as time goes on and roll with the punches. Revolutions will happen and everything will be different in a hundred years. Is anybody concerned that new chips in your cpu are measure in Nano meters or that micro chips are $3 a piece at the store now. The internet is only a small part of the future. The internetisshit.org reads like it as written by an 80 yr old cranky man with fond memories of his 2020’s lifestyle.
Posted 05 Dec 2020 at 11:25 am ¶
johnson wrote:
sometimes corn remains in shit. I have even heard stories of people farting and finding a corn kernel in their undies later on. yes the internet is shit and the corn is the information it carries.
Posted 21 Dec 2020 at 2:20 am ¶