You Know You’re From Where You’re From When

Although there are two supplements to the water post laying around in draft form, I can’t allow so much seriousness on the front page at once. So, it’s time to play the “find a list of ways in which you know you’re from a place and mock it” game. AHEM.

Per the rules of the game, statements with a particularly sonorous ring of truth are in bold, and inaccurate generalizations are italicized.

You Know You’re From Where You’re From When:

  • Your area experiences unusual weather.
  • You, and others in your area, enjoy talking about the unusual weather.
  • As a result of the unusual weather, your understanding of the terms “hot” and “cold” is different from conventional notions.
  • You measure distance between two points by referring to the amount of time it takes to travel from one to the other.
  • People from other places would be shocked at your blasé attitude towards a natural disaster which periodically affects the place you’re from.
  • You are familiar with the local freeway system.
  • You know how to spell and pronounce the name of a local town, village, or burb, which is often misspelled and/or mispronounced by others.
  • You’ve met one celebrity in your life, and it was a minor celebrity who lives in the same place you’re from.
  • You often manifest a certain verbal tic common to your area.
  • People sure do drive funny.
  • You often manifest a certain verbal tic common to an area slightly north, south, east, or west of where you’re from. – yeah right, this list isn’t about the place some other people are from.
  • You understand that your climate can be characterized by four seasons with hilariously nonstandard names.
  • You use an unusual part of your body for pointing or other gestures.
  • You think the four major food groups are comprised of two agricultural products grown where you’re from, the meat from a kind of animal common to where you’re from, and an alcoholic beverage.mmm, alcoholic beverage!
  • You know many people who attended college at a large university near the place you’re from.

Comments

  1. Rana wrote:

    bwah!
    Witty comment about one of the above listed points, chuckling about its inaccuracy or applicability to other places than the one listed.

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