Leave Me My Evil Sharks

Here’s the thing: I can kind of empathize with creationists who want to avoid museums which’s exhibits reflect actual reality rather than whichever creation myth they prefer. Because I do the same damn thing, but with sharks.

I don’t want to see any of these crap aquarium exhibits about how sharks are nice and you can pet them. Sharks are supposed to be killing machines! If a shark isn’t fighting a bear, or at least thinking about fighting a bear, or maybe fighting a pirate or a zombie crocodile or a porcupine, what good is the shark? Answer: no good!

The same principle applies to pirates; don’t tell me they didn’t say “arr!” all the time, because I know in my heart that they did, matey.