Sunday Review: Things That Are Red

  1. I tried some of the new Manly Coke Light product; it’s about what I expected, not as sickly sweet as regular Coke but with somewhat less chemical afterburn than Diet. It’s not the sort of cola taste I would associate with infinite manliness. But the package design assures me that it is, indeed, infinitely manly: the product name (“C2” which is off-puttingly reminiscent of energy drinks and/or goofy alloys hyped up in tool catalogs) is printed in a silver, squared-off font reminiscent of manly death robots, and the usual white text and decorative swirlites have been replaced with black. With black text and swirlies, if you squint at it, the can looks a bit bloodied.

    It’s not actually fair of me to associate manliness with violence like this. But the fact remains that this is a very forceful-looking can of cola, and I feel defeminized just by drinking it.

  2. L. esculentum var. ‘Carmelo’ – picked my very first tonight; it was mellow and sweet, with acidic bite in the juice. Very meaty. Though I’m holding back judgment until the plant is really in the full swing of things (and I have the patience to wait the extra day for the fruit to be really properly ripe) I would prefer a more assertive tomato flavor. Should make good sauce, though, and I’m drooling to think of pizza with fresh tomato chunks, basil, and goat cheese…
  3. Red wagons – the reviewer of the red wagon is faced with a thorny problem: it is trivially simple to understand why red wagons are awesome. In these circumstances, there’s not much one can do to impart value to the review, so the uninspired are left to indulge themselves with curmudgeonly commentary on the cultural forces behind all terrain red wagons or long and pointless philosophizing on the nature of childhood. Rarely does one see the use of Radio Flyer as a jumping point for a discussion of escapism, rationalization, and red wagons in popular culture, and how the red wagon under scrutiny is most effective at escaping from one particular set of troubles or another. Now that would be useful information to have when considering the purchase of a red wagon!

Comments

  1. Anonymous wrote:

    this website it terribible

  2. Rex Ferric wrote:

    No, it tastes *different* (but that’s okay by me — personal preference, I suppose…)

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