1. I’m actually satisfied with the type and quantity of email accountage I possess. But not only do all the cool kids have Gmail accounts, my lame-o coworkers have Gmail accounts. How did I fall so far behind the trend? And is anyone going to help me catch up? Graham Leuschke is my newest and heroest hero!
2. Somewhen, somewhere, there was a trick floating around for managing all the crap that normally appears in a blog sidebar: mini-tabs. Some fancypants script swapped, on demand/click, bio, links, and crappity-crap, so only one was displayed at once while everything was readily accessible without reloading. Anyone know what I’m thinking of here, and where I can see it in use?

I’m a cushion, and due to find lasting love and companionship with a floor lamp:

The P�SIG cushion has a special affinity with the RISKA mirror, the ideal partner for those long journeys. But although you complement each other perfectly, you won’t find true love with a RISKA. There is rarely that magical element of tension between cushions and mirrors. The SKYAR floor lamp, however, has a special aura that tends to cause any cushion in the vicinity to fall head-over-heels in love, which is something P�SIG cushions do easily anyway.

The Swedish version had me as a NORDEN dining table in a happy platonic relationship with a floor lamp, but of course I don’t speak Swedish so had to guess on a couple questions. In any case it seems I should buy more lamps.

(via the guestbladet)

Hiding in my inbox for a month, these have been. And glorious fragments of wisdom they are too:

i like dogs

Have I mentioned how the office dog is growing more and more neurotic? He’s not in most days anymore, but boy does he ever bark at shadows when he is.
(more…)

Coppertunity. No, seriously. Coppertunity for refrigerators, aloe-minium for cars. Sweet jesus.

But I for one welcome our new khaki-palette fashion overlords. I look good in pea soup.

(via Making Light)

To: Customers at the Foothill & Claremont Arco
Cc: SUV owners in the greater Los Angeles area

Peak pumping hours at the gas station (e.g., after work or at lunch) can be stressful - customers must often wait several minutes, fingers tapping on the steering wheel and fuel light flickering, while those ahead in line finish filling their swimming-pool sized gas tanks. We all prefer sitting in traffic on the freeway to sitting in the gas station parking lot, so it is to everybody’s benefit if pumps are utilized as efficiently as possible.

Many gas stations are configured with three pumps per row. Effective pump usage requires that all three pumps be occupied at all times, with minimal time losses during maneuvers to and from the pump. This can be most easily accomplished if, when driving up to a row of pumps where both the immediate and middle pumps are open, you drive to the middle pump.

It may be impossible to ensure that the fuel intake of your very large vehicle is directly aligned with the middle pump. Please note, however, that most modern gas pumps are equipped with hoses of adequate length for use with vehicles parked within a reasonable radius of the pump, and you don’t have to have it exactly fucking perfect, jackass. If you have questions as to the ultimate limitations of the hoses at your filling station, observe the Geo Metro in front of you, crudely jammed between two SUVs and pumping gas while located several feet from the commonly-used pumping area.

It should also be noted that this is Los Angeles, not San Fransicsco, and drivers here are not particularly well-known for their parallel parking finesse. Cars larger than subcompact class may be prevented from using the pump at all until you have finished; even if they are not, forcing the car behind you to parallel park at the pump wastes others’ time and patience, and increases the risk of a minor accident.

Following proper etiquette and taking care to keep the middle pump easily accessible will make the fueling experience better and safer for everyone.

I love the rhetoric of class warfare more than just about anything else in political discourse, except maybe pie. So I’m happy about John Edwards. What I’m not happy about is how such delightful righteous indignation of (or on behalf of) the proletariat keeps getting turned in to snarky asides about protectionism (see
here, for one example; there are more but I’m too late in the news cycle and too lazy to find ‘em). Whatever happened to unemployment insurance, affordable education, and a long-term effort to establish acceptable labor rights (via unions!) in the countries to which our jobs are flowing, huh?

Trade policy has only been in the air for like a week, and already I’m sick and tired of feeling like a moderate all the time. If we’d only go back to talking about foreign policy and nationalized health care, I could be a pinko commie again! A free-tradin’ pinko commie who frequently resorts to talking about health care as a barrier to enterpreneurship in conversations with the bourgeoisie, to be sure, but nowadays one has to take whatever socialism one gets and be thankful for it.

I am a WRCL–Wacky Rational Constructive Leader:

This makes you a golden god. People gravitate to you, and you make them feel good. You are smart, charismatic, and interesting. You may be too sensitive to others reactions, especially criticism. Your self-opinion and mood depends greatly on those around you.
You think fast and have a smart mouth, is a hoot to your friends and razorwire to your enemies. You hold a grudge like a brass ring. You crackle.
Although you have a leader’s personality, you often choose not to lead, as leaders stray too far from their audience. You probably weren’t very popular in high school–the joke’s on them!
You may be a rock star.

(via my polar opposite)

Looks like I was right about the bees - at least if bees are pelicans.

The concept of a separate (but assuredly equal!) lazy-blog for links to things that don’t quite deserve full entries - like articles on how L.A.’s palm trees are getting old - is growing more enticing. Meanwhile, though, I am obliged to elaborate upon the twoness and duality of the interesting things such articles contain:

1. The Los Angeles cityscape is still in search of a defining view. This time, they think it might be palm trees.
2. Good night, palm trees are expensive!

Driving home last week sometime, KPFK had an interview with Katya Komisaruk, a criminal defense lawyer and author of a newly-published book detailing one’s rights in various kinds of encounters with law enforcement, and how those rights are best exercised. I was surprised at how empowered I felt as I was driving off the freeway… then I read
Brown Equals Terrorist - devoted to the shiny new crime of “having a camera while brown” - and I’m surprised that I was surprised.